I got a new bass today. It's shit. But it's a bass and that's what's important. I haven't had one for around six months and it's been HARD, my fingers have gone weird. I had to sell by old beloved Warwick thumb to fund a project that didn't even happen in the end, TEXTBOOK (if you knew me you'd understand) Things have a habit of going wrong for me, I've come to expect it (not in a depressing way) and have been known to laugh outloud when they do :) ! But I'm used to it and I know 'it's' just like that, when you accept it life becomes a bit more fun (and obviously very annoying to!)

So at least now I can get my playing back to it's previously legendary status :) I love playing, cheesey as it sounds it is meditative in a way. Not in a sitting bolt upright staring at a wall bored type of way. More like having to be aware of everything that's happening but not thinking too much about what's going on or what you're doing. As soon as you concentrate your awareness on one thing one part of the whole picture you'll get something wrong and everyone laughs! Sort of like if you concentrate too much on your individual self and give it too much importance you miss the rest of everything and then get depressed when life deviates from THE PLAN! Better to just let go (not in a nihilistic sense), appreciate what there is because you can't change it because you're it! :)

Right enough of that, got a bit pretentious zen there. OOPS! See what the bass love does to me, far too excited.

Nice sunny day today, it seems summer is slowly arriving in Wallasey which means we get the great sunsets back.

Everytime I read a blog by another lay Buddhist I come away feeling like I should be spouting textbook musings about sutras, precepts and the like. Mine seems extremely boring :)

But then I don't really feel like I need to say anything else, I have tried but I always stop half way through because I feel like it's not for my benefit. It's like I'm trying to prove some sort of understanding to someone. Pointless. It's not like I can't write pretentious drivel, I've got a degree in Theology & Religious Studies so I'm an expert! LOL

It just seems really simple, you sit zazen, you get bored, you get on with your day until it's wall staring time again.

Back to 'normal'

Well I've got myself back into a nice routine again zazen wise, so that's good. Starting to feel 'normal' again! It's strange how you can notice the difference in yourself after you stop sitting for a bit and then re-start, it's hard to explain but there's definately a difference.

Back to the grind

Nice shiny new blog after my old one fell to pieces. Zazen has been a bit sparse recently, just busy doing a load of hours at work, I'll try and get back to it tonight.
Found a cool link today though on Gudo Nishijima's Dogen Sangha blog, I've never really had a good look at them before so it's probably been there for ages. It's a site called Treeleaf Zendo, and it's great. It's exactly what I've been looking for for ages, you see a lot of the time I'm away but even when I am at home there's no decent buddhist groups where I live that I can go and sit with. I mean there are some and I'm not slagging them off, but they're just not me. Obviously if I lived in Bristol I'd be able to the Dogen Sangha lot down there but as I can't this site will be a great alternative. It actually holds zazen online and you can speak via an online video link thing to Jundo Cohen the founder of the Zendo. I've never had a teacher before so it'll be great to get put right on a few things.